La Virgen de las Mercedes

I worked out that I didn’t want really to talk to you

all I really wanted was a shower and a sitcom or two to ignore while I surfed some strangers’ tumblrs

but here’s the thing:

I don’t want you to ever forget what you did to me. Because for some stupid fucking reason I’ll never forget you.

I want to drag you through each painful step of my recovery because you deserve to be here with me. You deserve this path each day and the pointed stones that have broken through the road, prepared for our feet.

I want to call you and remind you every day, every fucking day

that all in one night and one couch you brought 19 years and one week, all of 19 years and one week, to this screeching screaming searing halt

You deserve to be here, Taylor. You deserve me.

Come and accept my blame. Accept my guilt. Take it from me.

Keep taking and taking and taking, Taylor.